Thursday, 12 March 2009

Contains talk of "lady things", Art and rubbishish television programmes...

Ooh, my first blogthing. I should be asleep now. But I'm not, I'm still awake, at 01:26 on Thursday morning.



I just typed and deleted two mildly long versions of what I was going to say but I'm not going to post that, now... because I've deleted it and can't remember what I put...



Main points about me, should you be interested, dear reader:

  • I am 27-years-old.
  • I've had mental health "issues" since I was 7, and period kerfuffle since 12
  • Because of the above, I left school with no qualifications
  • I went to two colleges, first for GCSEs and, later, Art & Design
  • I don't work because of health stuff and I abhor not earning my own money
  • I'm not complaining about my health or my situation but sometimes, it's hard to keep the mood bouncy. I don't pity myself. I never ask "why me?". I don't say "it's not fair". Life is supposed to be a challenge and I don't ever see myself as a victim
  • I don't really know what I'm going to type in this blog and can't believe anyone might be reading it........ I really fancy some ham... why did I just get a strong craving for crumbed ham, fresh from the deli...?

I had Mirena IUS (it's not a coil... it's just not) fitted in early January this year... the reason was/is to lighten or stop my unspeakably painful, irregular, heavy, long periods. After 15 years, one might think they might have settled, as I'd been told many times over the years. But they haven't. After being told I should see a psychologist or psychiatrist as the pain might be psychological - :O - and then being told I was too young for ovary problems (at 26? What??) - again :O especially as I was then diagnosed with polycystic ovaries. Errr...... - a hormone imbalance, they say, is what is causing my womb troubles... I'm not totally convinced, I must say. If I am wrong, I shall admit so but... hmm...

I have tried four hormone tablets and they just don't suit me: I get desperately emotional, so upset, so very angry... this is clearly not good (in my opinion) for someone who wanted to end their life when, at the very deepest deep depths of depression, she was only 13-years-old.

Mirena releases a tiny amount of hormone but into the womb, where it's needed, rather than into the bloodstream where it gets in ma heed and messes with my mind, man...

I'm currently waiting for a letter from A hospital so I can have another pelvic scan to see if the Mirena is in the right place. I'm guessing, somewhat uneducatedly (is that a word? I don't think it is...), that it isn't, on account of the pain I've had every day since it was fitted.

Apparently, I've read, having a retroverted uterus makes it difficult for the doctor to get the Mirena in the right place and can cause some discomfort or pain. No shit, Sherlock. Sarcasm? Yeah. Funny? To me, yes.

It's late, I'm hungry... Lidl's own "Shreddies", I think. With fat milk, oh yes. Orange juice, Citalopram, Ponstan... bring on the drugs! Not *quite "bring on the wall!" but nearly as good... I'm referring to Harry Hill, not the Winton programme, you understand...

Shall try to finish knitting my hot water bottle cover today... Hm, yeah, today... 8mm needles, fat yarn, should be good... lovely and soft. By Wendy. Looks like boucle. Yawn, tired, hungry, sleep, bed... bed, then sleep... that's probably more practical.....

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